The first (of many???)

I guess this is more of a place for my art work, because I'm not actually a real person. But sometimes coherent thoughts are formed in my mind and this seems as good a place as any to dump them.
I'm getting really into printing on fabric and aspire to intern at the Fabric Workshop and Museum in Philadelphia this summer. The appeal of Baltimore is at an all time low of zero pleasure points, and the aspect of returning home for another summer living with my parents has become more and more undesirable ever since they almost filed a missing person's report for me one fateful Friday night last July. So I plan to carpe the diem this year and instead of selling my soul to Liberty Lake Day Camp, I will offer it freely to the Fabric Workshop. I applied for what is technically dubbed an "apprenticeship" there, even though I seem to have always associated that term with a carpenter's young boy slave or a shoe maker's lowly assistant. But I digress.
Anyway, it's extremely competitive (allegedly) and that makes me have doubts that I'll get it. But then again, maybe someone will find the concept of my yellow wool baby so appealing that they'll be dieing to have me work under them. I would love to be a silk screen slave.
More than anything I just want to begin to understand exactly what direction I want to take my life after I graduate from MICA (which I do plan on doing.) Maybe grad school (if the financing is available) will be the best place to go unless I find my calling elsewhere. But what to do with my skills... is as much a mystery to me as it is to the various family members who constantly query me about my future and the reasons why I might choose to wear a "hook" in my nose.
My back up plans for not being given this apprenticeship are interning for another Philly based printing studio called Printfresh, or a small fabric production business named Carolyn Ray in Yonkers, NY. The latter seems more unrealistic, as NYC is most likely not within my budget (and my budget now is non existent as I failed to find a real job in the past 2 months I've been hunting for one) and also the fact that I do not know anyone in the city to call upon in my time of need. But I am supposed to have an interview at Printfresh this week, where I hope to not embarass myself in front of my potential summer life givers by saying something stupid or irrelevant about myself, as I often do when I'm under pressure.
If all else fails, Baltimore is always ready to receive me with open arms. The rat infested urban sprawl is not nearly as depressing in summer as it is in the cold months, so I can't say it would be all that unbearable. But it would be beneficial for my sanity to get out of the city for at least 3 months before returning to begin my junior year to bite my finger nails and stress about my future and non existent career goals.
In other words, I have no concrete anythings. I have no place to live after this semester ends and hardly any money to spend that doesn't reek with the stench of parents' love and support.
It's a long shot, I know. But maybe writing these things down and sending them into ciberspace will trigger some kind of supernatural occurance known as "good luck" and I'll get what I really want for once. Until then, keep your fingers crossed for me. If this blog is still coherent enough to follow.